communist love song

it was well conceived in theory
but it doesn't work in life.
comrade has to wonder is it ever worth the effort?
well i don't know,
but i've been told not to hang on to my hope
well I don't but I've been told
and I've been listening all my life

if you're ever less than certain about the world
please don't let the worry make its way into your work
and if you would stick up for me
in the face of some adversity
know that I would only do the same.

cuz it was well conceived in theory
but it doesn't work in life
and me, I will not write it off not ever having tried
well i don't know, but i've been told
not to hang on to my hope
well i don't know but i've been told that these are lies
and they get old
so look me in the eyes under expanding winter skies
you'll find a feeling there that never knows the cold
look me in the eyes and the skeptic in me dies
the skeptic is a fool
we are exceptions to the rule


cuz this is our land this is our land
i will cross it holding your hand
from Kursk to Moscow
we will not be turned away

this is our land this is our land
i will cross it holding your hand
in crooked streets of petersburg
we are all the same
so if you're ever less than certain about the world
please don't let the worry make its way into your work
and if you would stick up for me in the face of great adversity
know that I would do the same, know we are the same

if you would stick up for me speak kindly and poetically
you can be my personal ambassador to the world

and if you're ever less than certain
i will be your Iron Curtain
i will be your Berlin Wall
and I will never fall.

-Soltero

the embers never fade in the city by the lake

I've been really fortunate to have been able to travel fairly extensively by the age of 20. I have been to 14 countries; most of them I visited during my semester spent in Italy. I have an insatiable desire to explore as many different lifestyles and cultures as I can- I feel like every new place that I go changes me slightly and deepens this curiosity. I remember reading a quote once about how no part of a person is completely original or emerges solely from their own psyche, but rather is comprised of the effects and results of every place they have ever been, and every person they have ever met. In 'Invisible Monsters' Chuck Palahniuk wrote, "Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everyone I've ever known." The internalization and comprehension of everywhere your life has led you up to that point. I think Palahniuk's quote is a perfect articulation of this. Every experience that I have, and person I hear speak contributes to my overall base of experience and knowledge, even if I don't necessarily subscribe to their ideas or belief system. I really believe in this, and I feel that the more places that I can go and the more people I can talk to, the deeper my overall skills to understand and empathize with others will be.



While I have this desire and appreciation for people with viewpoints different from my own and will never be content with a completely sedentary lifestyle, I don't think I will ever lose the fascination that Chicago holds for me. I had a conversation with my best friend once about how grateful we are to have been raised within 20 miles of a city teeming with diversity, adventure, and opportunity. I feel that the values and beliefs that I hold are often reflective of a Midwestern upbringing. Obviously, Chicago is a huge city and this could mean something completely different to each person that resides there. To me, though, the values that my family, upbringing, and Chicago have instilled in me are those of perseverance, an appreciation of and acceptance of diversity, and an admiration for people who are hard-working and down-to-earth. This sounds rather generic, and I guess these values could have been learned in many different circumstances in places all over the world. For me, though, they are representative of the life I have led in the Chicagoland area, and the intricate web of experiences and encounters that have moved outward from where I was raised. I say I hate cold weather, and winter in Chicago is bitterly cold. When people say you 'build character' doing things like shoveling snow or walking around in weather that constitutes a feeling of -20 F, I don't think it's just a sentiment of encouragement. I think they're right. If you don't have the ability to put a roof over your head in Chicago during the winter, you will freeze.

'i'm not big on rappers, actors, or models- if i had to dip, i'd probably skip to chicago' -atmosphere




Traveling has helped me to develop the ability to understand other ways of life and beliefs. It has built my ability to understand not only other cultures, but has made me more grateful for and appreciative of the place that I come from and the effects that it has had on me. No matter where I go in life, I will have had the opportunity to have grown up here, and certain aspects of my personality and beliefs will always reflect that. I will never forget the days and nights that I spent exploring the city, and the mystery and excitement that it often seemed to be teeming with.

You know what the Midwest is? Young and restless.

perfect:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJbLvQkCwRc

The night spent 'sleeping' in Grant Park to promote awareness for the civil war in Uganda. A night that wound on through discussions about religion and poverty, the global community and Chicago demographics through freezing early April rain and bitterly cold wind. The night of going to our first party on the North Side, not really knowing what we were getting into or how we would get home that night (or morning). The first time I volunteered in a soup kitchen in Chicago, not really aware of the poverty and hardship facing citizens that lived less than a half hour away from me. It is difficult to articulate the feeling that I get when driving north where 55 becomes Lake Shore Drive, and seeing the city unfolding- shimmering with as much promise and possibility as it had the very first time that I can remember going there.

all things go, all things go

Music:

Album: 'Come on, Feel the Illinoise' Sufjan Stevens
Album: 'Yankee Hotel Foxtrot' Wilco
Song: 'Dear Chicago' Ryan Adams
Song: 'Chicago X12' Rogue Wave
Song: hidden track following 'Always Coming Back Home to You' on Atmosphere's 'Seven's Travels'
Song: 'Tonight, tonight' Smashing Pumpkins
Song: 'Homecoming' Kanye West
Song: 'Slow Down, Chicago' Canasta
Song: 'Chicago Seemed Really Tired Last Night' The Hold Steady


By nights when the yellow salamanders of the EL bend all one way and the cold rain runs with the red-lit rain.
By the way the city's million wires are burdened only by lightest snow;
When chairs are stacked and glasses are turned and arc-lamps all are dimmed.
By days when the wind bangs alley gates ajar and the sun goes by on the wind.
By nights when the moon is an only child above the measured thunder of the cars, you may know Chicago's heart at last.
-Nelson Algren

american beauty

I didn't like this movie at all the first time I saw it, but I remember thinking at two separate instances of dialogue that I couldn't remember when something was put more perfectly, ever.

It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. And this bag was, like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember.


Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in. It's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life... You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... you will someday.

democracy and developing countries

this is from national geographic
4. Is the American model of democracy either achievable or desirable for developing nations that lack a democratic tradition?

I think this question should be divided into two separate sections. In terms of whether or not the American tradition is desirable, I think that in most cases the answer is ‘yes.’ I see the American model of democracy as being an example of effective representation and governance, of civil liberty and protected rights. If a developing nation could establish an American model of democracy, they will have developed a sound and effective government. However, in terms of the American model of democracy being achievable in many developing nations, I think the current answer in most cases is ‘no.’

There are numerous developing nations that are currently lacking a stable form of government. This list includes countries such as Ethiopia, Nepal, Afghanistan, Haiti, and Senegal. However, I feel that history has proven that if the US were to try to establish a democracy in a country lacking a democratic tradition, it will often be met with resistance and hostility. Even if the US is successful in maintaining democratic processes while it is present in the country, such as elections and representation of citizenry, I feel that the democracy will collapse as soon as United States forces are removed from the area. Why is this?

In order for a democracy to work, the citizens and current governing body have to want to implement it. A democracy cannot function without the cooperation of the citizenry. I feel that if a country contains a large majority of citizens that are in favor of implementing democratic practices, the democracy has a chance of developing, and ultimately thriving. However, the process of keeping up an effective democracy in a country lacking a history of this kind of government will be an uphill battle. In addition, there are numerous factors that will affect a country’s willingness and ability to establish a democracy.

I feel that the establishment of a functioning democracy involves much more than simply implementing democratic processes. The potential for a democracy to be developed in a developing country must be viewed through the lens of the country as a whole- economically, socially, culturally, historically. It is impossible to think of a uniform strategy that can be applied to all developing countries. However, I think that there are factors that need to be considered in the development of any democracy, anywhere.

In order for many developing countries to establish a democracy, I feel that they must first develop a sound economy. Obviously, this is much easier said than done. I do not feel that an overwhelmingly poor, economically destitute country will be able to either establish or maintain a democracy. Because of this, the US model of democracy is extremely hard to replicate in many developing nations.

In this way, the question of developing a democracy becomes much more complicated. I feel that for a developing country to begin to improve its economy, it should establish trade with industrialized nations. I also feel that democratic, economically stable countries making investments in the economy of developing countries will help these countries to develop a stable economy. However, this kind of process takes years. That being said, it will also be difficult for a country with vast inequities in the distribution of wealth to begin to implement democratic principles and expect them to be heeded. There are countries that claim to have a ‘democratic’ government but are actually hybrids of democracy and other governmental systems, like Sri Lanka.

I do not mean to suggest that a country has to have a flourishing economy and an ideal distribution of wealth in order to establish a functioning democracy. I am saying that a country already steeped in economic hardship and struggle between classes will not be capable of instituting a democratic system to solve these problems.

I feel that this question including the term ‘American’ model of democracy makes this even more difficult to see working in developing countries. The American model of democracy includes a system of government as well as civil liberty and protection of human rights. In this way, American citizens have the assurance of receiving certain benefits from supporting the democratic tradition. American citizens get civil liberty, the assurance of due process of law, freedom of speech…the benefits that Americans get from being part of a successful democracy are endless. However, how would the citizens of a developing country that decide to support a fledgling democracy benefit? They would not receive the invaluable benefits that Americans receive. In many countries, many citizens would fear the result of supporting a new and potentially controversial form of government.

Simply implementing democratic processes will not automatically give rights to citizens, nor will it solve long-standing conflicts due to distribution of wealth, class, religion, or ethnicity. In order for a democracy to be established, a society has to establish a precedent of peacefulness and human security. Once this is established, a developing country can use democracy as a tool to better its economy and to further protect the rights of its citizens. However, implementing democratic processes will not solve the long-standing problems of a country.

The United States is truly a unique country. While the American democracy is not a perfect entity, it has improved and developed over the past 200 years. Over these years the US has been able to develop and utilize relations with other countries, both for economic reasons and for support during times of conflict. The US has been blessed with the revolutionary insight of its Founding Fathers, a brilliantly crafted Constitution with room to change to accommodate a developing society, and a Bill of Rights. The US is composed of incredibly diverse climates and resources as well as a long-standing devotion to freedom of speech, religion, and the press. In order for a developing country to establish an American model of democracy, they would have to be in a position at least remotely similar to that of the US at the onset of its democracy.

That being said, I think that it is possible for developing countries to work toward a democratic government that will ultimately be unique to its country and be beneficial to the country’s society. At this point, I am differentiating between the American model of democracy, and a basic definition of democracy in general. Merriam Webster’s online dictionary defines ‘democracy’ as “1 a : government by the people; especially : rule of the majority b : a government in which the supreme power is vested in the people and exercised by them directly or indirectly through a system of representation usually involving periodically held free elections.”

Looking back in history, there are numerous factors that have contributed to the establishment of a democracy. These include such factors as increased literacy and distribution of news, the fall of a controlling power, mimicking the processes of the country that colonized them, development of political parties, religious movements and civil wars. Countries including South Korea, India, Israel, Iceland, and Zambia are counted among the world’s democracies. These democracies did not all come about from the same background. There is no single way to establish a democracy, and no one model of democracy that can be applied across the board. I feel that if a country can establish a democracy, the democracy will encourage development, and vice versa.

I also feel that the assistance of other countries to developing countries can be extremely useful. Organizations such as USAID have made huge strides in assisting developing countries, both politically and economically. However, this aid is not given on the condition of the country using it in a way that will promote development of the exact type of democracy that the organization sees as exemplary. The organization works with the communities of the nation to help develop the country and discourage extremism. It is unrealistic, (and inadvisable) however, to expect developed countries to support developing countries blindly. I think it is important and advisable for assisting countries to consider the state of basic human rights in the country that they are looking to assist and consider the ways in which their donation or assistance will be utilized. In organizations like USAID, the organization takes a very active role in the distribution of their help. I think that it in this case, it is much more effective for donating countries to lead my example and assistance rather than applied force.

Overall, I do not think that the American model of democracy is achievable in developing nations. The assistance of other countries is integral to the promotion of democracy in these countries, however the form of democracy that emerges from individual countries will be one specific to the country as a whole, considering every aspect of the country’s composition. The most effective form of democracy for a country will be the form that is specific to that country’s level of development, history, economy, and human composition.

nsa wiretapping and civil liberty

3.Protections of our national security and of our civil liberties appear at times to be in conflict. Please cite an illustration of this potential conflict and discuss how you would try to resolve or
balance the conflict.

Ideally, in the American government the rights and civil liberties of the individual would be maintained uniformly along with the protection of our national security. However, there are many instances in which it is difficult to uphold both principles without compromise. War is generally the primary cause of this difficulty. Perhaps the most recent controversial clashing of the protection of national security and of Americans’ civil liberties was the debate over the National Security Agency’s wiretapping during the Bush administration.

In December of 2005 it was reported that the “terrorist surveillance program” had authorized the NSA to monitor numerous forms of communication involving a foreign party shortly after September 11, 2001. From then on phone calls, e-mails, Internet activity, text messaging, and any other form of communication that the NSA believed to be outside of the US, regardless if one end of the communication was based in the US, was open to surveillance. The NSA had not acquired a warrant for surveillance.

The debate surrounding the controversy is an interesting one. One principle facet of the argument includes the limit of the authority that the president has. While the Bush Administration defended their actions based on the statement in Article II of the Constitution that states that the president has ‘all necessary authority’ to protect the nation from attack, the Congressional Research Service’s meeting in January of 2006 stated otherwise. The CRS cited the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act of 1978 that necessitated warrants before conducting secret surveillance.

Another key point in the debate was the fact that on September 14th of 2001 Congress passed a resolution allowing the president to “use all necessary and appropriate force” against those responsible for the 9/11 attacks. The Bush Administration stated that this justified the surveillance as a measure included in the necessary force. While the CRS agreed that surveillance is part of warfare, they disagreed that using ‘all necessary and appropriate force’ was a blanket statement that included tactics of surveillance. There were also several other examples and precedents derived from FISA and other instances of wartime exceptions.

In the NSA Wiretappings the main source of the debate was that the American people’s civil liberties were being compromised for national security. Both sides of this example have valid basis for their stance, and it is sometimes difficult to interpret the Constitution in terms of 21st century terrorism. However, I feel that allowing the NSA Wiretappings to stand as a precedent for unsanctioned Presidential-authorized government surveillance will eventually lead to the government far overreaching its Constitutionally granted power.

One aspect that makes the war on terrorism different from wars in the past is that there is no definitive end in sight. War is no longer waged in the way that it was in the past, and actors like suicide bombers are not concerned with the American justice system. Thus, it has become increasingly difficult to know how to prevent attacks on the United States. I understand that in the face of such uncertainty and against an enemy so devoid of concern for any kind of war policy that it may seem necessary to do anything possible to try to prevent attacks. However, I feel that the potential (and probable) ongoing threat of these attacks makes it necessary to resist setting a precedent for compromising civil liberty, one of the very beliefs that the US was based on.

Obviously, it is still of utmost importance to continue to prevent attacks on the United States as effectively as possible with the power that the government and President are given. I do not think that the American criminal justice system is a deterrence to terrorists in any way. I think that it is important for the government to be proactive in its search for terrorists, so that that an event like 9/11 doesn’t happen again. However, based on the administration’s admission, the wiretappings provided very little direct information that could be used.

It seems that if the Bush administration hadn’t tried to avoid getting a warrant and had complied openly with the FISA that this scandal wouldn’t have been considered a breach of civil rights. The main problem with the wiretappings was that they were secret, and unwarranted. This seems to send the message that the government can take whatever means they deem necessary in the interest of national security. If the proper steps had been taken before the wiretapping began, it would not have developed into the controversy that it did.

I feel that one way to balance this conflict in this case would have been to change the method that the government focused on to prevent terrorism. One of the most potentially catastrophic terrorist plots of all time, the “Day of Terror” plot, was prevented when information was received from an inside source. I am not an expert on national security methods, but perhaps more tactics like this, that are clearly not in conflict with Americans’ civil liberty, could be focused on.

I understand that methods like surveillance are at times necessary, but I do not think that legislation limiting usage of these methods can be flouted simply because the government deems it necessary. I realize that there are examples in history where this has happened, however through the years the reason that legislation has been crafted to limit these measures is because American people deemed it necessary.

If there is an instance where the American people feel that the threat to national security is so grave that extraordinary methods must be taken, then the proper steps should be taken to amend current legislation in favor of these changes. That being said, I feel that the government should definitely use the power vested in them in order to maintain national security, including wiretapping and similar measures. However, the usage of the measure should be in accordance with existing legislation. In this case, one of the main points of conflict was the fact that the wiretapping had been kept a secret. While the argument may be made that the secrecy of the actions was integral to its effectiveness, there was still no attempt to maintain a warrant to justify the action.

Because the threat of terrorism at present does not seem to have a definitive end, it is important that the precedent of impulsively acting without the correct legal procedure is not set. Once a precedent is set, it becomes increasingly easier to justify behavior based on that precedent. I feel that the NSA Wiretappings would set a precedent of unbridled government power and disregard for due process. Systems like checks and balances and veto power are present so that all facets of the American democratic process can consider ideas and legislation. There are numerous powers that the government has to protect our soil, and these powers are infinitely vital. However, civil liberty is also essential to the United States. The principles that America was founded on cannot be sacrificed in an attempt at national security.

abraham lincoln, powerful and sad

cemetery in georgetown

It is really hard to deny the grandeur of Abraham Lincoln. His views and actions altered (and in many ways, shaped) American history, and the implications of his thought process had (and have) an impact on a global scale. I have very strong Chicago pride, and pride in the Midwest as a whole. For these reasons, and many more, I feel that I have a larger than average appreciation of Lincoln. When I went to visit my best friend in Washington, D.C. I stopped at the Smithsonian Museum of American History, and there was a large exhibit dedicated solely to Abraham Lincoln. The exhibit portrayed the different facets of Lincoln's personality and life spectacularly. I never thought that Lincoln was a poet, but there was a poem by him on the wall that I found to be strangely poignant and powerful.

My childhood-home I see again,
And gladden with the view;
And still as mem'ries crowd my brain,
There's sadness in it too.

O memory! thou mid-way world
Twixt earth and paradise,
Where things decayed, and loved ones lost
In dreamy shadows rise...

I range the fields with pensive tread,
And pace the hollow rooms;
And feel (companion of the dead)
I'm living in the tombs.

-Abraham Lincoln, around 1844

I found this poem to be hauntingly beautiful and timeless. I always have a strange feeling going home that is hard to articulate, so I like when other people do it for me. There may even be someone who did it more accurately, for me at least. Strangely, it was in an 'Elle' article about Mandy Moore. This is an email exchange I had with a journalist, Devin Friedman, almost a year ago about the article he wrote.

-----Original Message-----
From: Carolyn Lang [mailto:carolyn4332@gmail.com]
Sent: Wednesday, December 24, 2008 04:20 AM Eastern Standard Time
To: Friedman, Devin
Subject: Elle Article

Dear Devin,

This is really random, but I just wanted to tell you that I read your
article on Mandy Moore when it appeared in 'Elle' magazine three years ago.
I am not a fan of Mandy Moore or a subscriber to Elle magazine, but I was
getting a haircut and I saw the magazine sitting on the counter so I read
your article on her. I was in high school at the time, a junior, and I
didn't (and honestly, don't) have an exceptionally extensive knowledge of
what comprises a good written article. However, for some reason, a certain
paragraph has stuck with me for three years:

"That Moore's talents were manifest at age 14 is why she doesn't get Braff's hometown fetish. She was gone during those years when adultish longings hatch. Those of us who remain captive in our small teenage worlds tend to transfer our longings (loneliness, desire, beauty, friendship, sex) onto our hometowns, hanging them from the trees we grew up near and the houses of the first people on whom we had crushes, like Christmas ornaments, where they remain, powerful and sad, whenever we go back home."

I think it was the relevance that it had to my life- that is, leaving for college and having a shifting view on the place that I called home, that made this sentiment so memorable for me. Whatever the reason, I remember being struck by it's poetic eloquence and practical relevance when I read it. In fact, the impression was so ingrained on me that I was able to recall enough of it to google the article now.

It may seem completely random and pointless that I would email you about this now, but for some reason I thought it mattered. I think it is the fact that I am currently a journalism major and I think that someone writing telling me that something I wrote had an impact on them would make my day.
Merry Christmas.

Carolyn Lang
University of Illinois, 2011

Hi Carolyn,
What a fantastic email to get. Especially because that was my favorite paragraph in that story. It was the saving grace in an enterprise that was otherwise kinda mercenary. Anyway, really made my day. Thanks for finding me. How did you find me, anyway? Meanwhile, good luck with your journalism degree. And please keep me abreast of your progress and work that you're proud of. Also, I know you go to illinois, so i'll just say: GO BLUE!

Merry christmas and happy new year.
D


-----Original Message-----
From: Carolyn Lang [mailto:carolyn4332@gmail.com]
Sent: Saturday, December 27, 2008 04:37 PM Eastern Standard Time
To: Friedman, Devin
Subject: Re: Elle Article

Hey Devin!

I'm glad you liked it- it was really random I know. I used to want to be a journalist but I have been kind of discouraged by hearing all my professors say that the field is becoming more and more difficult to enter because of reduced circulation of newspapers and other publications. Now I am thinking that I might minor in business and try to get a public relations job. Do you
like being a journalist? Do you have any advice? It seems like you have an awesome job. Do you write for a bunch of different magazines?

As for how I found you, it's kind of funny and investigative journalist-like. :) I googled your name and an adobe document came up with the names and email addresses of a bunch of journalists (for some kind of event maybe? I don't know) and I figured your name was unique enough that it was probably you.

I may be wrong but I am *pretty* sure we beat Michigan 45 to 20 this season. ;)

Anyway, thanks for emailing me back. I hope you had a good Christmas. Have a good new year's too.

Carolyn

Hi Carolyn:
Don't give up on journalism! Or at least on writing. Yeah, it's true, it's not what they call a growth industry. And if you don't love it, you should skip it. But I love it. And there's always room for people who are very good and very passionate about writing and/or reporting. And there's also the internet: lots of content needed there. My advice is a question: what do you want to do?
Meanwhile if you want an idea of my career (you asked about the kind of writing I do), you can check out devinfriedman.com. It's only half finished right now.
Happy new year and all best,
D



It's kind of funny that I see a poem by Abraham Lincoln and an article about Mandy Moore as expressing a very similar sentiment. Drawing these kind of parallels are an example of the thought processes that keep me up at night. Worth it or no?

quotes i like

i don't really understand accreditation for blogs yet, but this is from smalldog.wordpress

I really like quotes, and whenever I hear or see something particularly beautifully written I can't continue with what I am doing before I somehow record it. I feel like this is actually a good way to keep them all together. It'll probably take a few weeks to get all of the random documents, post-its, and pieces of paper together. This is a start I guess.

Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.
-Vonnegut

For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Van Gogh

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

Looks are so deceptive that people should be done up like food packages with the ingredients clearly labeled. 
-Helen Hudson


Beauty in things exists in the mind which contemplates them.
-David Hume

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.
 -Elizabeth Kubler Ross

It's all make-believe, isn't it? -Marilyn Monroe

i couldn’t help thinking- if people were rain, I am drizzle and you are a hurricane.

Sometimes it feels like we're all living in some kind of prison, and the crime is how much we hate ourselves. It's good to get dressed up every once in awhile and admit the truth: that when you look really closely, people are so strange and so complicated that they're actually beautiful. Possibly even me. -My So-Called Life

The world fascinates me. -Andy Warhol

There are only two ways to look at life: as though nothing is a miracle or as though everything is. -Einstein

'you and i are flesh and blood but we are also stardust.'

"Those who believe they believe in God but without passion in the heart, without anguish of mind, without uncertainty, without doubt, and even at times without despair, believe only in the idea of God, and not in God himself." -Madeleine L'Engle

a heart that has been broken can be open to the entire universe.

The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes "Awww!”
-Jack Kerouac

if you don't become the ocean you'll be seasick every day. -Leonard Cohen

I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear.
-Thoreau

I wish that life should not be cheap, but sacred. I wish the days be as centuries, loaded, fragrant.-Emerson

I appreciate people who are civil, whether they mean it or not. i think: be civil. do not cherish your opinion over my feelings. There's a vanity to candor that isn't really worth it. Be kind. -Richard Greenberg, New York Times

"I never felt that i was personally 'cold as gasoline,' so i can't identify with that part of the song; except that I know people who i imagine to be able to look at the world without as much emotional upheaval as I tend to do."
-Jeff Tweedy

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts."
-Bertrand Russell

There are zillions more, and I'll start putting them here straight from the post-it.

independent businesses

this is from scallywag & vagabond

I did an interview today with the owner of an independent record store and movie rental. It was about the decline of the independent music industry and the differences between 'big box' chain corporation methods and those of independent ventures. The conversation began as a discussion of local independent music and quickly became a discussion of independent businesses versus large chains as a whole.

The conversation was interesting and sad. I didn't know anything about loss leading or the history of independent music stores in and around Champaign. He explained how ultimately, most small businesses will fold and towns will become more and more homogeneous as they house the same chain corporations. Right now, it seems that large chains and corporations can sell certain items for much less than privately owned stores. There are certain business incentives and strategies that make this possible, especially for certain items like CD's. However, once these corporations, specifically in the music, movie, and book industry, gain a monopoly there will be no incentive for them to keep their prices down. Theoretically, then, these chains will be able to dramatically raise their prices while consumers have no alternative to shopping there. Thus, there will be a market that literally will not be able to sustain an independent business. Aside from that, would a bank even give a loan to a business it knows from experience will probably fail?

He explained his disappointment at this trend of short-sightedness, but also expressed his awareness that consumers have to act in their own self-interest. It is unrealistic to expect every consumer to consider the welfare of independent businesses when they make day-to-day transactions, especially during the time of an economic recession. They would be foolish to try to dedicate all their money and time to supporting independent businesses. I can't stop thinking about the implications of this, though, with examples of this kind of trend rampant in the microcosm of our campus. I have to write a 6-8 page article about this now, and it is really difficult to distinguish my feelings about it from an objective description of what is going on. I don't like to think of myself as an idealist, but when I hear real-world accounts of things like this I become very disappointed, making that label kind of hard to deny. The last time I felt like this was when we watched 'Nothing but the Truth' in my JOUR lab. That's another topic though entirely I guess. If you can see it, I recommend it.

It's disarming how an hour long interview can occupy your mind for an entire day, especially about something that I didn't think about very much at all before. When I get into an inquisitive mood like this it is very difficult for me to focus on anything else. I'm not obsessive, I'm just curious.